Exclusive, get it here first, the captain planet movie poster finally revealed. There have long been rumors about a live action Captain Planet movie, and dorkass.net is the first to bring you the actual movie poster! HOLY SHIT!

Sometimes the M in MILF means midget

We bet you can't taste the garden hose, take the Taco Water™challenge today!

So I've been writing my first novel for a few months now, and every once in a while I kinda get a little slow.. I'll spend a few hours just trying to shart out a few pages, and that can get frustrating, so I decided I'd start writing a few very short stories when the mood catches me. You can find them in the Thoughts section

I wrote this about 5 years ago, just found it in an old notebook.. I was visiting my girlfriend and she was at work, so i was just chillin in her room waiting for her to get home.

 I stayed up too late,
can't exfoliate
gonna go upstairs and masterbate
on a plate
sa - tur - ate
make your mom regurgitate,
test my fate,
lower my rate..
I can't wait
to find a mate
set some bait,
trap her in a crate,
stab her ass like Sharon Tate.
That was great,
better than exercisin with pil - ates
coulda just not ate..
cuz I'm gettin fāt -
feel about 2 weeks late
need to take a big shāt,
hope that toilet don't retaliate..
that would suck. The end.

copyright 2005